- I automatically scope and find the guy or guys I could be interested in as soon as I get to the party or event. I look for wedding rings, then female appendages. If I do not find either, the person in question gets added to the mental list and it is extremely difficult for me not to pay attention to where that guy is and what he's doing for the rest of the evening. That gets into Rule-breaking territory, because I'll be looking at him or subtly putting myself in his general vicinity.
- This generally applies even if the pickings are slim. In such cases I will find myself focusing on the pasty guy wearing the absurd sweater with buck teeth just because he's not quite as old and fat as the rest of the people in the room. Not because I want to go out with him, but because I am bored. (This particular large-toothed individual did not ask for my number, by the way, although he did approach a conversation I was already having with someone else and then left after three minutes.)
At the superbowl party I quickly zeroed in on a dark-haired guy in glasses. I stared at him whenever I thought he wasn't looking, and thought I caught him looking at me a couple of times. But aside from wayward glances, I followed the Rules - I moved around the party from room to room at natural intervals, and did not sit next to him or introduce myself to him.
At the end of the party, I was helping my friend clean up and dark-haired guy and his friend came up to us to say goodbye. I hadn't officially met either of them so the friend introduced himself. Then dark-haired guy did, with was one of those handshakes that was a little on the long side, and a smile and a gaze to match.
When he walked away, my friend whispered "is he Jewish?" and I girlishly replied "I don't know!" She bounces off and ASKS the guy if he's Jewish. He says no, and then asks why. My friend says "oh, I thought you were cute, and my friend over there is single but she only dates Jewish guys." Apparently his response was "Damn, should have said I was Jewish!"
Is it breaking the Rules for my friend to do that unsolicited? I think it would have been if I had told her to do it, but she did it of her own accord. In any case, this is sadly the closest thing I've had to success so far. I sort of protested to my friend that I would have dated him anyway and that she shouldn't have told him I only dated Jewish guys. She chided me for this response, and was probably right. What I probably wanted was not so much to date him, but to blog about dating him. But at this juncture, can I ethically do the Rules on non-Jews that I know there's only a .01% chance I'd actually marry? Especially if the probability of my marrying crazy sweater guy is less than that despite his membership in the tribe?
